Re Hash : Don't Be In The Top Ten

With what has happened in the past weeks . The AIDS conference in Toronto , the anniversary of Katrina ...I thought I'd re-post this ol'blog . I still think North America's are fast asleep , in their little bubbles . The question was and still is . What is it gonna take to wake us the fuck up !?!? From 9/11 to the loss of meaningful jobs in the U.S. We , the middle class , are on the verge of collapse . Every year since the year 2000 our yearly income has been depreciated and union jobs are becoming extinct . With all Americans purchasing "Shit Jap Cars" , spending money at Wal-Mart and Home Depot and looking the other way as the World suffers . Is there any wonder we as a nation are doomed .

"Die Yuppie Scum" !






The world is our oyster ... Ever heard that term ? I have and I always thought it was true . Guess what ? It's not ! The world is not ours . It belongs to no one . We are entitled to nothing . We are just along for the ride . "Bless that ride "! We are the fortunate sons and daughters of immigrant's that created a society on stolen property .That's it , no more , no less . We're the descendant's of thieves ! Some of us are good , some of us are warped . Which brings me to the true scum amongst us . "The most vile , disgusting , piece of shit that ever crept out of the primordial ooze"! " The Yuppie" ! I hate these mother-fuckers more than the devil himself ! Why ? "Entitlement" ! They think they are entitled to do anything they want ! From destroying the environment to treating people with less , as shit under their shoes . "Now Wally how do I know if I'm a "Yuppie" ? "Here's the Top Ten asshole"! : 10) If you drive a motorcycle that looks like a "Harley" , but it's not . [You've seen these fools , all leathered up , half cap helmet , black sunglasses & then jumping on a "Yamaharley". "Dems is badass dudes"! "YA RIGHT funny goofs" !] 9) If you own a Jap car . 8) If you have an afflicted voice " Iiii havve theee moooost goorgess puooool....Blah, blah, blah". " "Jeeeramy and I aaare gowing toooo theee mooost beeeuuutiiiful island ...BLAH". 7) If you play golf . [enuff said] . 6) If you have a wife that's more than 20 years your junior [ Lucky Though ! ] . 5) If your daughter's name is Missy & your son's name is Chad or any other white bread name . 4) If you went to an Ivy league school or if you didn't go to Ivy league school , but you say you did . [also a lair!] 3) If you lease a BMW , Audi , or Benz . 2) If you voted for George W. Bush [ OK the first time you were fooled shame on you , but the second time ? ...your an idiot !]. 1) If you have credit cards all to the max , you have things all around you , your kids don't respect you , and you feel sooo... empty... Your a pathetic Y-U-P-P-I-E bastard , and I hate you ! You should die ! Not nice ? TOO BAD ! If I see one more woman or man with their kids yapping about what they have I will barf right in their "Baertini" stroller . "Promise" ! We all are lucky to live in this society , a society of hard working white , black , yellow & red immigrant's . To have this group annihilated by shit-heads seems crazy . The upperclass snobs will be our ruin , having the these assholes try to pass as the rich is retarded ! We are middle class people , sometimes upper , sometimes lower and should be proud of that . We should give back to our society and reach out beyond . To build a strong middle class in other areas of the world . South East Asia & Africa are slave nations . To who ? US THAT'S WHO ! We have to find our way back . We have to give instead of take . Food , water , medicine , education... Show them how to build , live , fend for themselves and with that take pride in themselves . We're killing these people off , taking their land & using their children as slaves to make , tennis shoes . SICK ! In ten years we will not recognize our planet . Our globalized consumption will kill off all trade unions , all Medicare and with it , all of our Freedom . Fight the good fight ! Join freedom fighters like Adbusters , the ACLU , Amnesty International or bring an union into your work place . Hey I'm just a rant'n vugarion but I think most of you agree . Don't you ? Freedom To All Wallycrawler .

OK Here's Da Car I'm Gonna Buy...

2006 Saturn Ion RED LINE : 205 hp Super Charged Over 40mpg.

Nice Interior , Recaro Seats , Great Gages , On The Opel Body Shell .

I'll Make The Purchase Around December Or January . I Love Drive'n This Car .

Here's The Car I Really Wanna Buy ; 2007 Saturn Sky Red Line : 260hp* ,

Turbo Charged , European Opal Body Cage . Again Over 40mpg . Nice Car !

I Drove It As A Non-Turbo Charged Version And It Was Amazing . It Gets More

Looks Than The Porsche Or The Corvette .

*This car could be over 260hp. for insurance reasons GM is underestimating it's horse power ratio . They do this with the Corvette Z06 also .

This is Metallica's best video and maybe one of the best videos ever made . The cover of Bob Seger's "Turn The Page" . Staring the very under-rated "Ginger Lynn" .

Have a great Week !

Da Wallycrawler .

We Have Been Outed...

The Secret Is Out...
I'm the real reason why she and Tom broke up .

OK , OK , OK... That Was Total B.S. I Just Wanted To Post Pictures Of Her Nude . I Like The Way She Looked Before All The Facial Surgery . Now Her Face Looks It's Always Tight And Her Eyelids Look Pulled . Like A Cat .

Why Can't Actresses Just Age Gracefully ? I Can Understand Getting Your Boobs Done After A Couple Of Kids . Or Maybe Some Lippo , But Getting A Face Lift Before Your Forty Or Fifty Is Just Crazy !

Before :

After :

Enuff Said ! Sa Later Wallycrawler .

Re Hash : Da Puppet Will Cry !

With what happened yesterday in England , I thought this post was appropriate .
What is happening with the "War On Terrorism" ? I'll tell ya "NOTH'N" ! Canadian troops are in Afghanistan getting their heads blown off , daily , as American troops are mered down in Iraq . Why the fuck are we fighting the U.S.'s war when the Bush administration just doesn't care ? What the fuck goes on here ? Seems ta me Ol'Georgie wants his so-called "enemies" to stay around .
"Hey Dumba" ! "The Fight is in Afghanistan and Pakistan" ! "Where da fuck are ya" ? "Whenever your ready wanna send in at least half that fighting force ya have in Iraq , so we can clean up those fuckers" !

Here's something most people don't know . The Taliban is regrouping in the south and is hitting our troops hard and has killed 12 and wounded many in the last couple of weeks .

George Bush is , Nero .



I use to love my freedom . My freedom to grab a paper , watch TV , work , go to bed & sleep . Sounds boring eh ? Other stuff did happen during my normal day , some good and some bad but mostly mundane & I wouldn't have changed it for the world . Give me a average day and I'll show you a happy man . Lately most days haven't been so average most days have been filled with anger , rage , disbelief & contempt . Things haven't been the same in over 5 years [hmm.. What happened 5 years ago?... Guess ?] In that time my family watched my brother die of cancer , my daughter & nephew diagnosed with diabetes and my wife's father die suddenly . Bad horrible things , but things I or anyone else couldn't have changed . They were inevitable . What makes me mad are the things we , all of us , could have stopped . Iraq , the twin towers ,["yes we could have stopped that by voting in a human instead of a puppet"] and our freedom of speech . We have looked the other way during all of these events . We looked elsewhere when we should have looked within . I know the government was pointing another way! But we should have asked the right questions & searched for our own answers . During the towers I was listening to Howard Stern . He was very calming and throughout his radio cast his message was . "We will overcome this tragedy ". "We'll round up the people involved & justice will be done ". "Believe in our President"! . "He'll hunt down these guys"! "Ohhh OK "!!! "When" ??? During the WMD fiasco "President Dumba" pointed to Saddam as the man with an axe to grind & access to nukes . "Yaaa right" ! When Janet flashed her "ugly" tittie Dumba's stooge Michael Powell sic'd the FCC on anyone who didn't preach the "Right" agenda . And what did we do... Nothing ! We sat there watching our TVs , reading corporate newspapers , tisk tisking . "Oh what , oh what can I do ". "Well how about getting involved IDIOT"! I was really stuck at what I could do . I had no power or voice . I'm just a schmo like you . Then I thought I do have a voice & I'm not all that retarded ! Ill protest ! OK where ? And do I have the time ? Plus I hate the ugly bastards who show up at those event's ! Ahh fuck it ! There must be a way to show I'm alive & not amused at this bullshit . Thus this blog ! It's small but at least I have a voice . In my opinion the media is an "old town gossip" and should be treated as such . Tell it something & seconds later it's a"fact" ! The "right wing" knows this & it's about time we used it the same way . I'm a liberal democrat , [big surprise!] I'm also a socialist , I'm a conservative & I'm a "humanist" . I think we're all like that in some whey or another . A liberal at heart , "live & let live" . A socialist in education & medicine ," we all should have quality health care "! A conservative , when in a fight "win at all costs ", but pick the fights wisely . But most of all a humanist . Let me tell you what a humanist is . A humanist believes in the truth . The truth comes in all kinds of flavors but none of them taste good . The truth always smells bad and is horrific to look at . A humanists job is to expose the truth . We will be sick doing so, but it has to be done . The "news" in the last 2 weeks or so is just the tip of the iceberg with this "scumbag" & his sycophants . We'll all see how we were duped by a moron & his cronies just to steal oil , sell it at inflated prices & set in place a corporate world that's so corrupt that we'll all barf just to think about it . God bless those women & men in the military . Also bless the men, women & children that are being killed . These people are being used as pawns so Dumba can live the life of "Riley". The" fortunate son" will soon be exposed as the "Devil's son" . When truth comes to light look for "chaos" in a form of a plague . This vector is already in place & guaranty you it will be cast when he is exposed . Vice Pres. "Large" Dick , (did you see that picture of that guy what the fuck does this blob got in there a baked ham ? Too bad he can't use it !) has imposed his corrupt evil on the world. But the people will rise up and demand his resignation soon . If you thought Watergate was bad... , wait! This is our burning Rome . We have front row seats to the end of the corporate world . Don't be surprised or afraid of it's swift extinction . Just pray for it ! Sa Again Da Wallycrawler

In closing what I wrote in December has come ta pass , all except the impeachment of Bush and Chaney . They dodged a large bullet . I've come to believe America doesn't care about the truth or justice in their country anymore .

To Bad !

To see what Bush escaped see this movie "The Big Guy" .

Hungry ? Why ?

With obesity being what it is in North America . Is "McDonald's" to blame for our health problems in America or are they the easy target by liberal marketers . After reading "Fast Food Nation" and watching "Super Size Me" , I was torn . I know that fast food is anything but good for me , but is it a killer ? ...Yes , yes it is !

I've come to that conclusion not by seeing or reading documented fiction , cause that is what "FFN" & "SSM" are , fiction , I have come to this conclusion by observation . By watching my fellow workers . I've watched what they eat and what fitness level their at . Now I'm no doctor , nor am I a dietitian , but I have gone to chiefs school so I know a little about food and how it's processed and prepared . In the years in the restaurant business I can honestly say food is safer and healthier now than any other time in history . That's not saying eating at "Burger King" is healthy , anything but . In my layman's eye I have spotted compatriots consuming "McDonald's ", "Harvey's" "Wendy's" and the people who eat it daily or regular are in this category: "They're fat" ! "They are tubs of lard" !

Do you think those words are harsh ? I don't , I really like some of those guys and gals , but they have to realize they are being programed . They are being programed by the Orwellian ad agencies and the "New Media" . By making everyday consumers weight problems seem small when in reality they're MONSTERISH ! I'm not being fatuous here . There is heavy hitters out there paid to keep you fat . Highly paid "Fat Friends" , scum who come into your homes daily masquerading as friends or know-it-alls . All with the same message . "Your OK Being Fat , It's Normal" ! Don't believe me ? For example in the "New Media" we have both "Oprah" & "Doctor Phil" both over weight seeming successful people . These "Ugly American Media Hounds" are making "up-teen" amount of shows about youths wasting away with a mental disorders called "Bulimia" and "Anorexic" . When in fact young American youths are dieing of obesity related problems almost 200-1 . That's not to say anorexic isn't a serious disorder , it's is , but it's a rare disorder that can be treated by psychotherapy . When children or teens become thin , not emaciated , but thin , it's hardly "News Worthy" , unless your paid to make it "News" . I read , just yesterday about a young boy , 17 , dieing on the football field of a heart attack . He was over 280lbs . Do you think his parents thought he had a problem ? No ? I don't think they thought anything of it . Mainly because the whole family was over weight . We as a nation are sick , not only physically but mentally . These charlatans Oprah and that "Quack" Phil are giving Americans a sense of "OKness" about "carrying a few" . It's bullshit through and through . It's not "OK" to be fat . It's ugly and that's a honest response . Settle down if ya want bullshit go to another blog cause I'm not going to hold back . I know some of ya might be thinking "Att-oh... Old Wally here just went all Mel Gibson on us" ! No far from it . I have friends and family who struggle with weight and I love them . It's not that . It's because I want everyone to live a full , happy and healthy life . I think we have to stop mollycoddling "The Fat" and we have to stop mincing words . I think we must start using words like "It's killing you stupid" ! Or : " You look like shit"! Or : "Wake the fuck up . You have a fucking family that depends on you"! Or : "Your a fat slob , your breathing crazy and ya can't keep up" ! Or my favorite , "YOU ! YA YOU ! Your dieing ...and I love you" ! "Please don't die because I don't know what I'll do without you" !!!

We Americans and Canadians are not living in the real world . We have an eating addiction . The funny thing about this addiction isn't what we eat , it's when and how much we eat . I've witnessed these poor slobs furrow through their lunches bitching about their "new" diet . "I have ta eat this rabbit food, my doctor said I have hyper tension and high blood pressure and high cholesterol and I'm a million pounds over weight..." Blahh Blahhh Blahhh... Then they pick up their lunch boxes and they're 2' x 2' x2' red lunch boxes filled til overflowing . They pull out a salad that's 2lbs or more of food , add chicken and glop on 4-6ozs. of "Diet Rite" salad dressing . Did you ever here of "moderation" ? Here's another couple of words for ya "small portions" ! Here's the trick of eating and maintaining a healthy body , not a cut . 6 pack frame , but a healthy body that looks nice in slacks . QUIT FUCKING EATING SO FUCKING MUCH ! Eat meals or snacks 6 times a day . Doesn't matter when just space them out . Eat only when your hungry ! That's key . If your not hungry , DON"T EAT ! Chances are your body is telling ya something . Like ,eg : "I'M NOT HUNGRY , DON"T NEED TA EAT " ! Drink water . Not tap water that's shit ! Drink bottled R.O. water or buy a Reverse Osmosis water filter . When your feeling hungry between meals it's usually your body telling you , "I'm thirsty , drink" ! So drink , water , not sodas ! If you want to maintain your stealth form start a fitness program or sports program or walk or run or ride a bike or ride your wife ...Just start doing something and have fun . If ya have some fun you''l keep doing it . Or work your ass off like da Wallycrawler . That'll keep ya thin and lean or at least you'll look nice in slacks .


"The media is making us all pigs and feeding us swill" . Ya that would be way to easy . By blaming the "crack dealers", when it's us who are to blame . It's always easier to blame the "dealer" , but in reality it's the " junkie's " fault where "he's" at . Why is it in North America we always blame the other guy for our problems ? The courts are all full of frivolous law suits . Why can a man who smoked for over 20 years win a law suit over "Big Tobacco" ? Didn't he here of lung cancer and how smoking cigarettes causes it ? Of course he did and he didn't heed the warnings . So it's "The Marlboro Man's" fault ! That bastard sold me "Smooth Smoking Satisfaction" and now I've got an iron lung . "Pay Up Man" ! Ya I pointed fingers at the media . But in the end who the fuck are we kid'n ? We knew they were blowing smoke up ours asses . It was just easier to give in to our cravings . Who in their right mind would take advise from Oprah Winfrey ? Look it's OK to have a burger once and a while . That means monthly or less by the way ! In the past I've ended my blogs with "Let's change our spending habits" or something like that . This time it's a little different . Please let's change our eating habits . Lots'O'Love Da Crawler .

"F Mad Max" !

I Dunno About You , But When I Get Drunk I Never Become An Anti-Semite
I Have From Time Ta Time Hit On My Wife's Friends ... With Great Results I Might Add .

Kid Stuff "Redux" .

I've never been crazy enough to jump Niagara Falls on a "Jet Ski" , but I can see what he was trying to do . Here's something from "The Way Back Machine" . Something I wrote last year . Hope ya enjoy...


Do you ever push the limit ? When you were young did you do dangerous things ? Are you lucky to be alive ? I am ! And I'm bigger for it !
When I was a kid I did some crazy stunts , they give me the chills just thinking about them . At four years old my family joined a troupe of vagabonds in a traveling carnival . We would go to different State & County fairs all over the east coast . Ontario , Michigan , New York , Ohio , Pennsylvania ...all over .
My first stunt was at a Ohio County fair , [dunno which one ] but they had prize pigs . Big f'n pigs ! I would climb in the pen with dem hogs jump on their backs and ride those fuckers all around . I was a " Pig Rider Extraordinaire " ! My daughter loves this story . " My Dad rode pigs "! Doesn't sound to dangerous does it ? I didn't think so either . Until my Dad found out . He bitch slapped me some hard . Seems that hogs don't like being ridden much and they like the taste of little children . Dad told me if I'd had fallen off there was a good chance them pigs would have torn me apart , eaten me bones and all , within minutes . Ewwww. Scared the fuck out of me because I rode those guys for days and nobody knew . I went back the next day just to show I could do it again but the farmers had taken them home . Crazy !

In Ontario Canada we meet up with a true stunt show "The Hell Driver's ". If you were lucky enough to see these guys , you know what a great a show they put on . Cars crashing , motorcycles jumping , fiery hoops , real cool stuff ! Now my sister was kind of cute , young , but cute . So the guys would always want to show off and take her for a ride . "Hey girl want to go for a ride around the track "? Me , being the "kid brother" and always being at her side . "No but you can take my brother Wally , he'll go ". I'm sure this is not what he had in mind but he went along with it . " OK Wally . You wanna go "? " YOU BET " ! Picture a four year old kid in a stunt car , no helmet , hitting a ramp , as the car goes up on two wheels and drives around a dirt track . Fun! Ya great fun til my Dad found out . I think that guy was lucky to get out of that alive ! My Dad was a tough cookie with a brown belt in Judo and blistering temper . Luckily sis took a liking to the driver! Her and Mom begged Dad not to kill the "Hell Driver" .

At the midway I was the King . "THE KING OF THE MIDWAY"was my name . I'd walk down "Broadway" & the "Carneys" would say "HEY KING"! No shit I was king , the gang really watched out for me . I'd even run some of the kiddie rides ! At night if I didn't want to go to bed the guys would hide me on the Ferris wheel , sometimes I'd fall asleep on the floorboards of the wheel as it went round & round . I think that was dangerous ? Ya think ? Anyhoo.. I never kicked the thrills.

I was lucky enough that my Father was a good provider for our family . He had a lot of disposable cash . To my Dad all cash was disposable . Dad would buy us snowmobiles , motorcycles , horses etc.... After our "Carney" experience Dad and Mom bought a go-cart track . My sister was a fearless racer . She would race the men and beat the shit out of them every time . She would drive a cart "full out" around that track . I loved watching people's reactions when she'd climb out of that cart . Mouths open , jaws drop as a 4ft. tall girl smoked them on a race cart . I would watch her and afterwards I'd drive that cart . Man I wished I was old enough to race ! Dad lost the track so I never got to race , but I know I could have torched those asshole too ! When I was ten years old I jumped a minibike over a 3' tall x 5' long lumber pile [ no helmet ] . I made it but I busted the front forks in half . Oooh , the kids in the neighborhood thought I was cool ...or crazy ...or both . My Dad thought it was stupid and slapped me in the head . Needless to say that minibike was no more , he gave it away .

At eleven years old my Dad bought me my first horse . I 'd had a few ponies before . She was a former race horse . Man could that mare could run . Fast man ! Real fast ! Although she was a thoroughbred circuit horse she was very kind , she had the disposition of a good mother & I know she loved me . I guess your think'n how I know this ? For the simple fact that I really didn't have the strength to hold her . If she wanted to she could have dump me anytime . She was a real sweet ride . If you have never been on a thoroughbred going full out , it's a unbelievable ride ! It's wild ! There's nothing out there that's as much of a "RUSH" ! I've chased that feeling many times from bungee jumping to driving a motorcycle at 150mph. Believe me there's nothing out there ! The sound of the horse snorting , the wind in your ears . The feeling of the horse smoothing out , like your floating , up & down , up & down. Hands clinched , bent forward , it's head close to yours . You become in-sync with the animal , focused . The adrenaline pumps like crazy ! After a hard ride your eyes are like saucers . "AMAZING" ! Again no helmet , ever . Lucky !

One of my stunts that failed was when I fell off a roof , 10 ft. up , head first, right on my bike's spokes . The bikes spokes cushioned the blow . I spent a week in the hospital with a concussion . Should have worn a helmet that day ! The reason I was on the roof ? I was setting off fireworks in a old mill . Now that's super crazy !!! Ever seen a dust explosion... woooosh ! I'm lucky that didn't go up in flames . I'm not a thrill seeker and I wont pretend to be one , but I try to live my life to the fullest . I've been blessed . Blessed to live a full life & not been seriously hurt ! I shutter sometimes at my actions . Why did I do those things , why do I want to do more of them & why I didn't go to jail ?! Some guys are always chasing a "RUSH" . "A way to feel alive ". Hopefully my next adventure will be just as memorable . Some people don't even remember their early childhood , mine is as vivid as yesterday and I'm just touching what I've done . I wouldn't change any of those experiences . except the concussion !!! Remember Play Safe ! Your Helmet Wear'n Wallycrawler

I Feel So Foolish...

Toby Reminded Me About Jessica Alba . How Could I forget About The Hottest Star In The Business ? I'm Slip'n In My Old Age . Or It Could Be That I Was Sick The Day I Started This On Tuesday . I Think It Was The Latter ! Anyway Here's The "Hottest Bod" In Hollywood ...














Dee End Da Wallycrawler .

Who Do I Find Attractive ?

At work da guys and I play : "Who do ya find hot" ? We think of all kinds of female celebrities and if ya can stump the guys , by naming a "starlet" nobody knows ? "Who , who , oh ya dat chick" ! This game always fun and a good time waster , especially when women play with us . Then it becomes ,"how do we disgust da gals" ! We wink at each other and name porn stars , drug addled semi-stars or celebrity pigs . "Paris Hilton" ! "Whitney Huston" ! "Savannah Samson" ! The girls always have the same thing to say , "Who , Savannah who? Ewww. Your sick " ! Or "You think Whitney is hot , did you see her lately" ?

So here is the "Hottest Celebrity / Star" . You can add to it in the comments and I'll post the pictures .




1) Virginia Madsen . From The Film "Sideways" . I've Had The Hots For Her Since Her Performance In The Movie "The Hot Spot" !

So sez da Wallycrawler...





Die Murane Chooses Kate Beckinsale .

I See Your Kate And Raise Ya Sarah Michelle Gellar .

So Sez Da Wallycrawler...

OK Toby Has A Chick . There Is No Way Toby Gets This Game ! Man Does This Guy Have Problems Or Has The Best Sense Of Humor I've Ever Seen !

OK I'm Next . Toby's Was Weak , But Very Funny ! I Raise Ya The Obvious Lindsay Lohan.

So Sez Da Wallycrawler...

Da Blond Gal In V.B. Likes Them Stacked With Hot Lips So She Picked Scarlet Johansen . A Very Sweet Choice I Must Say , Someone Who Was On My List .

So Da Crawler Must Collate This a Tad To One Up Blondie . This Will Be Hard . In More Ways Than One ! HEHE...

OK This Was Hard , "Was" Is The Appropriate Word . I Had To Go In My "Way-Back" Machine , But I Have Da Perfect Woman . Horny , Hot , Tall, Legs That Reach The Sky , Someone Different Than Any Of The Last Women Chosen . Hey If Ya Change The Last Letter in Her Last Name It Expresses My Feelings Exactly . I Give Ya Angie Everhart .

So Sez Da Wallycrawler...

Les Likes Heather Locklear , Me Too ! But I think I Can One Up Dat "Cougar" ! Hang On...

My Friend Over At Crallspace gave Me A Suggestion . We Need Women Of Hispanic Flavor . Well Being Of Latino Blood , My Grandmother Was From Panama , I'm All Over That ! So Here She Is . Da Woman With "Da Bootylicious Azz"...Shakira !!!

So Sez Da Wallycrawler...

Hey Toby Came Back With A "Blast From Da Past" ! Nice Too ! Dawn "Mary Ann" Wells . Hey Who Da Fuck Thought "Ginger" Was Hot With Her Around ?

So Sez Da Wallycrawler...